Confession.
One of the most common emails/direct messages/instagram comments I get is “Where did you get your shoes”.
Now, I love shoes, I totally do.
But lately I’ve been struggling with the frequency of the question, especially when the photo/post is about self-love or is sharing something pretty personal like sharing the truth of the day (usually that stuff ends up on Instagram). To be honest when I’d receive that question, requesting information about where I got the shoes (different than just ‘I like you’re shoes), I started to a bit invisible. Do people only want to know about the shoes?
I share a lot of self-portraits not just cause its the work that I put out in the world, but because it is a daily practice I do to evolve my own relationship to self and as you may have discovered, foot self-portraits are one of types of self-portraits that we can do a bit more subtly than others (a bit about why I take foot self-portraits here).
I confess it each time I get the shoe question it has been building up and even bothering me a lot and I’ve been wondering what to do about the shoes. Its not a bad question to ask of course, I just somehow let it overshadow the other awesome questions coming into my inbox.
Then today I had a bit of a conversation with myself that cracked me up and shifted this whole “Is it just about the shoes” thing for me (yup, and helped me get over myself).
There I was, in the bathroom after a bath, putting on makeup. I was doing a little cat eye thing I’ve been doing lately, ever since going to Alexandra Franzen‘s workshop. I think I’ve been tryin’ to channel a little Franzen, make-up style.
As I was cat-eye-ifying myself thinking about how to handle the ‘shoe issue’ it hit me.
Maybe the shoe questions aren’t disconnected from the self-love message after all.
Did I sit through Alexandra’s workshop just thinking that I should start wearing cat eye makeup?
Oh heck no. The total opposite. I was writing like a madwoman, having brainstorm after brainstorm leaving me so excited and energized yet more full of ease about putting my writing into the world in hopes that it will help people.
I think perhaps the cat eye thing is a beautiful daily reminder of that inspired energy for me.
So maybe when people ask where they can get the shoes, maybe it isn’t just about shoes?
Maybe they are listening deeply just like I was at Alexandra’s workshop and are wanting those cute shoes to stand taller in themselves and to wear in the photos they are seeking to make space to see themselves with kindness.
Maybe the shoes are a tool to help them get there.
Or maybe they didn’t see the message and it is just about wanting cute shoes. But then somewhere along the way the shoes will remind them to invite themselves into a photo or to look at themselves with love.
Maybe the shoes will be a reminder.
Maybe indeed.
It just took me being in that place myself to realize it.
So, I definitely plan easier for people emailing/messaging about the shoes to find that info and you can find all the info you need in this blog post, but I’m glad I turned the corner on this and got over my own overwhelm (and for the record…don’t be afraid to ask the shoe question if you wanna know…I’d just love to learn a little bit about you alongside it too)!
Maybe those shoes will remind you when you wear them to see yourself with compassion.
Now if that overwhelm or invisibility happens again I can remember this and hope that the shoe questions will be a tool to open the door to inviting themselves into the photo!