I took this iphone self-portrait the other day in the community garden.
You’d think because I take so many self-portraits that the self-reflection aspect of it would wear off, I’d learn all I needed to and then it would just be about taking yet another photo.
But thats not the case.
Not at all (in case you were fearing that taking self-portraits would make you egocentric. I really truly believe it is quite the opposite that has the potential to happen).
The more I continue on this journey, the more insights happen and the next layer of the onion gets peeled back.
This photo sparked one of those moments for me.
I looked at it. Looked at me and what I loved about the picture made me smile.
I loved her fullness. I loved her big cheeks (sometimes I might have bypassed a photo in the past if I felt like my face looked really wide). Her smile lines. Wholeheartedly.
It reminded me of what a friend had once told me about what she was seeking in a partner. She wanted someone to love her for who she is, not in spite of it.
I think we all want that. To be loved for our quirkiness, what makes us different. Not just have someone accept it.
Of course, #beyourownbeloved style, I can’t help but turn that on ourselves too.
I feel like for a long time now, there have been aspects of my self-portraits that I love in spite of what I see. I think this is oh so powerful and important. To see a photo that shows parts of ourselves we might have otherwise wanted to delete and to say ‘I love this photo anyways’.
That itself is a big beautiful realization and a major part of seeing ourselves with kindness, not discounting a photo because of something we see in our physicality that negates the value of the whole photo. Loving ‘in spite of’ can be a revolutionary step!
But it feels like a new stage, a new unfolding, to see myself and my body with love because of what I see.
The two parts of my body that I tend to try to photograph in a certain way so you can’t quite see them the way they are in reality are my belly and my upper arms. Yet lately I’ve been letting go of that and sharing more photos that show my belly and boldly show my arms. I’m starting to see those parts of myself in a very different way and loving the photos because they are visible, not in spite of it. This feels wild and free…because my arms and my belly haven’t changed. My perception of them did.
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I thought I’d share this with you today and invite you to see photos of yourself with love in spite of what stories your inner critic might be telling you….but also to invite you to make room for those moments where you might see yourself with kindness and love because of what you see.
The you that always was there, that didn’t have to be transformed into another ‘you’ to be seen with love.
The you that is just there, ready to be seen with love…when you are ready.