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When teaching Be Your Own Beloved, I like to do the prompts alongside the participants.
Because there is always more self-love work to do.
Because I often get different realizations from the same prompt.
Because I believe in this class.
Because I need the prompts too.
Today was one of those days when I woke up knowing what today’s prompt is and had a bit of resistance to doing it. Because, of course, it was the prompt I most needed to do today.
You see, lately I’ve been really excited about some of the ways I’m hoping to bring Be Your Own Beloved to the world in bigger ways, really hopeful about some potential opportunities, really just believing in myself in a way that is kind of new to me. I felt so excited that I seemed to get out of my own way and really step into being brave in ways where I would usually be filled with fear.
Then, one of those opportunities didn’t end up happening (which is the way things go) and last night I felt that hope and belief in myself and this work falter. Or rather fall to the ground in a big THUD.
I’ve been working for a long time to make my belief in myself not be based around other people’s acceptance of me or my work, but dudes…I’m so human…and there is so much more work to be done.
So this morning, I pulled out my iPhone, despite my resistance (and as I tell the participants…we have to follow that resistance as its a clue that transformation is ahead) and did today’s prompt for the class.
I’m not going to spill the exact prompt (as I want you to experience it for yourself….come join us for the next session in February) but I altered it a bit, knowing what I needed to do today and I looked her in the eye, in the camera and said:
“I believe in you” and had to say it a few times before I really felt it.
As much as today I really wanted to run from myself, from disappointment, from tenderness. I had ironically provided myself with the exact prompt I needed today. To not run from myself.
But rather to show up for her. To look her in the eye and tell her what she most needed to hear.
And I’m doing my best to listen.
What do you most need to hear today? Could you say those words to yourself (even if its hard to do)?