Learn to See Yourself with Compassion

November 20, 2013

Celebrating One Year of Be Your Own Beloved

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It was a year ago, right about this season, when I felt a shift.

I had been teaching self-portrait classes for the past 2 years, focusing on the technical & artistic aspects of self-portraiture. I had been adding in activities about self-love but it wasn’t the focus.

Until this moment when I spilled the words ‘Be Your Own Beloved’ into my journal and I knew that was it.

That was what I most wanted to share with the world: Seeing ourselves with Kindness & Compassion through our Cameras

It was derived from my own journey using self-portraiture as a tool for healing body image and cultivating self-compassion.

So Be Your Own Beloved was born.

To celebrate the one year anniversary of launching Be Your Own Beloved I wanted to offer something special for the February Session.

But first, I wanted to share a few things about Be Your Own Beloved (in case you’re wondering exactly what happens within those 28 days of class).

Be Your Own Beloved isn’t about having no inner critic, but IS about connecting with our inner critic and letting it know that we choose to tell a different story.

Be Your Own Beloved isn’t about taking ‘perfect’ photos, but IS about showing up for ourselves in front of the camera and learning to look at ourselves with love.

Be Your Own Beloved isn’t for people who already feel completely & totally comfortable taking self-portraits. It is absolutely for those of you shy away from being in front of the camera, or think you aren’t photogenic, or who struggle with seeing yourself with compassion in photos (in other words…your inner critic comes up).

Each day in class I share a photo, story and a prompt for you to try…yes, some of them might feel outside your comfort zone & yes, some of them will feel really gentle. All the while, you will be surrounded by kindreds also on their self-portraiture journey and truly…the energy in our collective Flickr Group is absolutely amazing and supportive. You will not only feel welcomed with open arms but also SO inspired by your peers, encouraging one another to be brave in our journey to see ourselves with love.

You are invited to join me this February (yes, the month when all around us is a focus on external love) for a class that just might change your life (if you let it)…

Now here’s the thing…I know its vulnerable to start a self-portrait journey like this and often it can help to have a friend along for the adventure.

So to celebrate the anniversary of the birth of #beyourownbeloved…I wanted to invite you to…

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Bring-a-Friend to Join You for Be Your Own Beloved!

Sorry! The Bring-a-Friend offer is now closed but come on over and find out about the next session of Be Your Own Beloved. I’d love to have you join us!

November 15, 2013

Be Your Own Beloved in Somerset Life!

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I realized that while I shared about this on social media, I haven’t shared about it here on the blog! Over the last year I’ve had the chance to photograph or write a number of articles for magazines, primarily the Stampington Magazines: Mingle, Artful Blogging and Somerset Life.

I was beyond excited when they asked me to write an article sharing my message of Be Your Own Beloved and it has been amazing to get emails from lots of folks who have found me through the article (and the article in Artful Blogging earlier this fall)! Seeing those words ‘Being Your Own Beloved’ and my name on the cover…oh my…such an honour.

Here’s a glimpse into the article! I don’t think it’ll be on the shelves for much longer but should still be available both at the Stamptington site or your local Chapters (in Canada) or Barnes & Nobles (in the US).

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November 14, 2013

Introducing: Beloved Mentoring!

I’m SO excited to finally be able to spill the beans on something new I’ve been working on for a while now: Beloved Mentoring!

It is an invitation to you to work one-on-one with me, exploring self-love through self-portraiture and seeing yourself with kindness through your camera.

In the last year of teaching Be Your Own Beloved it has been really amazing to see how certain prompts are so effective in helping a participant break out of their old stories and step towards seeing themselves with love. I’ve been observing how for each of us, the tools of transformation will be a bit different and I’ve been yearning to be able to work one-on-one with people, inviting them to dig deeper into the activities that help them thrive on their path to self-love.

So I’ve been gathering up new prompts, preparing for this program and have created a mentoring offering I am so excited about and really believe will be a transformative experience for you.

This is how it works…We set up a date for our Mentoring call and spend an hour together connecting about your self-love journey. Its photo mentoring, but with a side of open hearted listening!

After our call, I spend the remainder of the day thinking about you and your journey and gathering together a collection of photo prompts just for you, to help spark your self-love journey through self-portraiture. Then I deliver a gorgeous PDF to you, packed full of activities that you can explore at your own pace (or on a schedule…whichever works best for you). Then you’ll be invited to share your photos with me for loving feedback and encouragement.

Yes, its like your own personalized Be Your Own Beloved Class (though of course, not 28 days long).

The Beloved Mentoring is about:

Seeing ourselves with love
Getting old stories out of the way and making room for new ones to emerge in our photos
Getting support on your self-love journey & being able to ask all the questions you might have about self-portraiture
Having encouragement & guidance on your beloved path. Like in the course, I’ll be inviting you to go outside your comfort zone but in a way that honours your journey.

Come learn a bit more about the Mentoring on its new page (and you can always find it here by clicking ‘Work with Me’ on the top menu bar).

Oh…and in case you’d like to connect with me about something that is outside of the realm of Be Your Own Beloved but you’d love an hour with me to brainstorm things like:

Taking your first steps into Photography in General
Finding Your Voice as a Photographer
Tips for Creating E-Courses
The Ups & Downs of the Creative Entrepreneur Path
The Artistic Side of Taking Self-Portraits (and tools you might use)
iPhone Apps and Post-Processing
Or if you’d just like to connect for an hour and ask me anything that arrises!

I have a Mentoring option for you too!

I have been wanting to work more one-on-one with folks and I’m so excited to connect with you and be a supportive part of your self-love journey!

November 8, 2013

Eye to Eye

When teaching Be Your Own Beloved, I like to do the prompts alongside the participants.

Because there is always more self-love work to do.

Because I often get different realizations from the same prompt.

Because I believe in this class.

Because I need the prompts too.

Today was one of those days when I woke up knowing what today’s prompt is and had a bit of resistance to doing it. Because, of course, it was the prompt I most needed to do today.

You see, lately I’ve been really excited about some of the ways I’m hoping to bring Be Your Own Beloved to the world in bigger ways, really hopeful about some potential opportunities, really just believing in myself in a way that is kind of new to me. I felt so excited that I seemed to get out of my own way and really step into being brave in ways where I would usually be filled with fear.

Then, one of those opportunities didn’t end up happening (which is the way things go) and last night I felt that hope and belief in myself and this work falter. Or rather fall to the ground in a big THUD.

I’ve been working for a long time to make my belief in myself not be based around other people’s acceptance of me or my work, but dudes…I’m so human…and there is so much more work to be done.

So this morning, I pulled out my iPhone, despite my resistance (and as I tell the participants…we have to follow that resistance as its a clue that transformation is ahead) and did today’s prompt for the class.

I’m not going to spill the exact prompt (as I want you to experience it for yourself….come join us for the next session in February) but I altered it a bit, knowing what I needed to do today and I looked her in the eye, in the camera and said:

“I believe in you” and had to say it a few times before I really felt it.

As much as today I really wanted to run from myself, from disappointment, from tenderness. I had ironically provided myself with the exact prompt I needed today. To not run from myself.

But rather to show up for her. To look her in the eye and tell her what she most needed to hear.

And I’m doing my best to listen.

What do you most need to hear today? Could you say those words to yourself (even if its hard to do)?

November 3, 2013

Shrinking Body Shame (and how Running Tights feel Revolutionary)

So, this afternoon I went out for a run. It was that perfect kind of fall weather…sunny but cool and I know that so much of winter running is usually all about the rain so I wanted to savour the day.

For the first time ever…I wore running tights.

Now, after many years of being a runner, this felt like a pretty big deal.

I mostly have worn running clothes that are pretty loose (or to exercise in general) but in the summer and up until now, something shifted for me.

Did my thighs shrink enough that I was finally cool to wear something so fitted? Nope.

Thats not the reason and also, that doesn’t feel like the relationship I want with my body: One of ‘not enough’ and of being worthy of self-love when I reach a certain goal.

But you know what is shrinking…my body shame.

I run, with these strong legs and they are not something to be ashamed of (nor would they be if they were bigger. Or if I wasn’t a runner).

In the summer I had started to wear running skirts which I definitely think helped me feel more comfortable in running clothes that weren’t baggy and helped me shift towards today. But my skirts still hid my upper thighs, so today feels like a coming out of sorts. As a plus size runner who doesn’t want to hide her body under baggy running clothes anymore.

So I thought i’d get even braver in that moment and practice what i preach & take a self-portrait (and I shared in on Instagram as I finished my run)!

I wanted to share this with you as this path to seeing ourselves with kindness and our body with love is a process and I’m really grateful that what is shrinking is not my body itself, but rather my shame around it.

Because I truly feel that I won’t look back with regret about my body size and wish I was a size 10 (or smaller) but I do feel that I will look back and wish I treated myself with more love just as I am whether or not my body shifts & changes.

To me its about finding my way home to my body and to confidence in it and its a long and winding path. Yet every so often, a little something happens (like deciding to wear my running tights) that feels like a moment of celebration and progress on the path of self-love.

So thanks for letting me share this moment with you.

P.S. The tights are from at Athleta (its these ones in case you are wondering)

And if you’re craving to shift your own body stories and shrink body shame, come join me for the powerful Body Stories class starting March 1st!