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Category Archives: Life
We’ve had some grey days in Vancouver this week and I’ve been feeling it.
I’m ready for the sun, the light, the intensity and the subtlety of it. I’m ready to be overwhelmed by it.
I’m ready for skirts and sandles, for sitting in the grass and for the shade even been warm.
But it isn’t here yet.
What is a bit of a saving grace in this grey stretch is the pink. The puddles of pink encircling the bottom of a tree.
The perfection of the way a complete bloom falls face up on the ground and stops me in my tracks.
The pattern in which the petals fall, creating natural and evolving art.
The way an entire street can be covered in cherry blossoms as though it were fresh snow.
I’ve been mainly carrying my iphone on these rainy days and here’s a bit of the pink helping me get through the grey.
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Sunday was a day like no other.
It really was a day 2 years in the making.
I did it. I ran my first 10km race.
I’ve been working towards this since January, returning to running after getting a stress fracture training for the same race last year.
I woke up nervous and excited, surprised that my excitement was even more powerful than my nervousness. I headed downtown Vancouver where many streets were shut down for this race. You know, cause it was just me and 48,000 others running! I arrived early, checked my bag and chatted with folks around me while the streets got more crowded by the minute.
Then it was time, and my wave of participants began running.
Honestly, the time flew by so fast because all I was focused on was trying to weave around all the people who would stop all of a sudden and keep myself moving.
We ran through gorgeous cherry tree lined streets, by the beach and across bridges that were normally full of cars. It was incredible. Every so often I’d look behind, or the road would stretch out ahead and I’d just see tens of thousands of people ahead and behind me. So beautiful.
Running isn’t always blissful and I was prepared that it might be a miserable experience but I was shocked that I totally loved it, felt great and did it. My goal was to run the whole thing and I did just that.
After lunch a dear friend met me for a divine brunch at one of my favourite restaurants, Bandidas.
In a way, making it to the race, pushing myself to get out there each week to train and completing my goal was a way for me to rewrite some stories that I have in my mind. I felt them shift the moment that I crossed the finish line.
Rewriting the story that I’m not athletic or can’t succeed in sporty things.
Rewriting the story that I give up, self-sabatoge. Cause this time I sure didn’t.
Rewriting the story that you don’t have to be tiny and naturally athletic to run. There were folks of all shapes, sizes and ages out there running.
Rewriting the story that I’m breakable and that any moment my leg will break again.
Rewriting the story of my goals, one that now includes a desire to keep running, keep getting stronger and likely race again.
It was a weekend like no other. Now the soreness is kicking in but it was definitely worth it!
Everything slows down as I watch the image in a polaroid emerge.
Softly and slowly what was once a blank slate becomes a clear picture.
Watching the moment I just experienced become something I can hold onto tangibly.
To tell you the truth my heart is a bit heavy today. Grief is strange creature. Even years later (7 years in this case) it still visits us on those days when that person left the earth, we got the call or found out the news. It is uncomfortable to walk through the world on these days with a heavy heart yet at the same time I wouldn’t want it any other way.
To not let those people disappear into the background of the story. But to have those moments when you still want to shout out loud like on that first day you found out “Do you know what an incredible person once walked this earth and is now gone?” To remember they were once here and to remember what they taught you.
So on this day, every year, I let the world slow down like when I watch a polaroid emerge. For this day, I let that grief that is not a part of daily life anymore, have a place to sing her song.
As spring emerges, I’m trying to take little photo walks around my neighbourhood.
Scouting out the streets that are completely lined with cherry trees and checking in on some magnolia trees that are just starting to bloom. I so love this season, when all around me things are blooming and we west coasters emerge from our grey winter cocoons.
Neighbourhood photo walks are feeling just right lately. They are the perfect afternoon break from my computer and especially these days, it feels good to get more acquainted with what is in bloom.
I’d love to know, whats blooming in your world (either literally or metaphorically of course).
